In Nov. 2009 I took a risk, a big risk. I didn’t know how it was going to turn out. I just knew I needed it. I needed to get out of my safe box and do something different… I felt it deep inside me, so I just did it. I resigned from my long corporate career with my official last day on Jan. 4, 2010. It was an emotional day, to say the least.
I had felt so confined, like there was something inside me wanting to be released, but I was suffocating it. I was scared. I do admit, at first the kids were not so keen on the idea of changing things. It had always been like this. Mom working out of the house, Dad working in the house. Change is not easy for anyone and usually we have to be forced into it. I was overwhelmed with many emotions and knew if I did not take a risk that the next day I would wake up in the same situation I was in that day.
It was now clear to me.
NOT changing had become more of a risk than changing.
Have you ever felt like that?
I still feel there is much more inside and I am the only one holding me back. Last year I worked on not holding back, but I know I have a long way to go to truly feel at peace. That word “scared,” it comes into my life more than I would like it to. I work hard to overcome it, to walk towards my fears and not shy away from them. It is a battle, but one that I actively fight every day.
Today isn’t about rattling off statistics of how many shoots I have done, how much equipment I have purchased, how many workshops I have attended, or how much I have photographically accomplished in this year. For me, it’s a celebration of walking towards that fear, of taking risks and not letting all the doubting words have control in my life. It is a day to celebrate a kind of freedom. A cleansing of one’s mind as well as all that surrounds one’s life, my life. I still have a LONG way to go, but I have taken a small step in the right direction and that feels good.
I know that growing a business is not easy, especially not today, but I also know that I am doing it for the right reasons. I am not in it to be better than someone else or to make a lot of money or come up with the next best thing that everyone needs and wants. I’m in it to make a difference somehow, I still don’t know all the possibilities of that, but I know someday I will. I want to continue to challenge myself and grow and listen to God. I let Him lead. I am no longer in charge.
Thank you for supporting my journey. I especially want to thank those that have made themselves known… who have commented on my blog, have left Facebook comments and messages, who have emailed, talked to me in person, texted me, called me and booked me. It is YOU that has made a difference in MY life.
Happy 1 year Birthday CONNIE RIGGIO PHOTOGRAPHY. Here is to another great year of facing fears and taking on the challenge of every day. I hope you will join me once again. I do enjoy you so.